First you have to understand supporting a soccer club is a active form of fandom bordering on obsession. My Club. First and forever. Tattoos. Has one famous English manager once said.
“You don’t choose your club. It chooses you.”
It’s a mystic moment when the stars align. Down from the sky an invisible bolt of true blinding passion and devotion strikes. One where all the artificial mental barriers built on irrational fears can’t stand the force.
Mine dissolved on the drive down to Detroit on that beautiful sunny day. My association with the Beautiful Game had begun on a pitch of sand in a public park. Attending a centrally located Catholic college prep high school in Houston meant a sizable international presence enrolled. Add to that the Eastern Prep school kids relocated by their parents work. You have the instant making of a pretty good soccer team. One in which a first time player could easy fit without damaging the chances of winning. My position? Central defender. The one place where tough aggression mattered more than skills. And a good sense of timing when to use it.
Soccer still was just a sport I played. My theory of becoming devoted to any sport is that moment when all the skills you’ve been struggling to master click in place. It happened on a muddy field. The flattened, slightly trenched, middle third of the grass mound. The alter of the Texas high school football that soccer was grounding allowed to trespass on. My continued frustration of getting the ball to go where I wanted was all lack of practice and mechanics. What seems natural is everything but.
On that cold February afternoon my foot connected just right. A twisting ball going away from the keeper. One he actually was challenged by. Finally praise from the coach. Someone who had played all his life. That was 1979. A year later Houston got an NASL team. My father got tickets when the Pele led NY Cosmos came to town. I saw the world’s greatest player the way most of the world did. Has a miniature figure on the expanse of green field. Without the crazed atmosphere cable and satellite would bring into the living rooms and basements from the worlds great stadiums from around the world. .
The cheap newsprint half sized soccer magazine arrived every month for two years. By than the Houston Hurricane had moved to be re-branded in another city. Where they failed once again. That was also the state of my soccer experience until the World Cup in 1994. The mutation introduced into my system on that muddy field lay dormant until 2012. Modern soccer followed the pattern sat down by the other American sports. Baseball had radio. Football and basketball used TV. Soccer lives on the internet. Following links I discovered Detroit had a club. Five minutes later my season ticket and scarf package was ordered. The very cool credit card size season pass is still a treasured item. Not knowing if I would get to a match.
In the 20+ years since moving to Michigan, there had been no desire to see Detroit. The city’s troubles were reinforced by my in-laws prejudice towards it. A bigger part for me was my Navy years had been on a ship overseas. Perth Australia during the Americas Cup. Hong Kong. Singapore. London with the reserves. After growing up in Houston, American big cities were ordinary in comparison. Detroit City FC give me reason to break through many reason for not exploring once again. At the time three were supporter groups. All had Facebook pages. The Northern Guard had the in your face attitude I liked. They became my destination.
My first match started with a paper map for the confusing Paris inspired spoke and wheel pattern of streets out of downtown. DCFC played at Cass Tech. A small high school stadium that framed the skyline where I-75 cut through the heart of Detroit. The exploring soul discovered in those foreign cities took me the length of Woodward Avenue from 8 mile to Harry’s. Where from the upper deck you can see Ford Field and Comerica Park. With the collection of Art Deco skyscrapers built when Detroit was known has the Paris of the Midwest.
America’s Road takes you through landscape of every major urban metropolitan area in the nation. Every major boulevard, sunken interstate or train viaduct created a stark snapshot of decay or prosperity. My two experiences with the streets named MLK reflect the state race in America. A shiny facade where it crosses major arteries leading somewhere else. Behind are long stretches of poverty and neighborhood sliding out of the middle class. A left turn took my journey on a unguided tour through those blighted lands the world sees Detroit has. But also the ignored spots of hope where people stubbornly refused to be defeated.
All the talk of the dangers of Detroit echoed until I got out of the car. Parking by the school puts one in the microcosm Detroit exemplifies. The homeless or lost in the central park. Where the intricate craving of every style on the exterior of the largest Masonic temple in the world anchors on side. A block long multistory castle wall facing empty graffiti covered buildings. The modern glass and metal high school by extensions of Wayne State’s footprint. Past, present and future. A continuum hidden by distance in many urban areas.
Asking directions from those wearing the rouge and gold I found myself on Henry Street. It was in that instant when my past became my present. Olongapo City with wider streets. Years of domestic living fell away. The awareness honed in foreign cities gave me confidence. This was the same way I had seen other countries. Not from the safety of all inclusive resorts or cruise ship day trips. Behind the facades are bare concrete block and tin roofs. Outdoor cooking and trash. It was in this comfortable state of mind I first encounter what would become my other family.
The large home made flags that have become the hall mark of the NGS lined the metal fence. Defiant. Profane. A battle cry refuting the family friend suburban soccer culture so dominate in America. Screaming skulls. Skeletal middle fingers raised to the world. The Northern Guard had taken over the upper deck. The open fronted covered space where beer was served in plastic cups. Food was sent up from the kitchen below. Standing echoed the terraces to follow. The first person that greeted me was a tall thin black man with a full beard wearing a black cap with the Detroit Tigers D. It was has if a long lost family member everyone know of but had never met walked in the door. What followed was introduction to many I would come to know over the course of the short season and social media. Every where was inclusion. The tattooed and professional. City and suburban mixed in the intoxication of being part of something they had only seen on TV. An emptiness being shared.
Then the drum. What would become a shared heartbeat. Learning the chants no longer used. Along with those that are the soundtrack of soccer tailored by each supporter group. Sarge’s pre match speech. The March to the March. Smoke and flags. The gathering behind the main stands. An unabashed or apologetic dismissive in your face attitude toward the day opponent. Detroit vs Everyone. Filling the Visitor stands. Flags placed along the back supports. Where the wind would display them to full effect. The touchline separated from the raucous roiling supporters by a mere four feet. The NGS choir singing the National anthem to the flag and the downtown skyline. A flag that earlier had flown on fire bases and outpost by a supporter in Afghanistan.
By nature a writer is an observer. A detached presence while still occupying a position in the crowd. Mental recording not just sights but the underlying emotions. To be later translated in the imperfect medium of words. The world in which I live. Except that day. A conscious decision to join. There is being part of the crowd or being the crowd. The temporary subjection of the self to be part of something more. I entered into the joy of being the crowd. Joining the celebration of emotional release.
When the final whistle blew, I was exhausted. Details of the match were unimportant. Couldn’t even tell you if we won. What happened on the aluminum bleachers of a typical high school that day was some much more than a sport event. One voice. One heartbeat. Total surrender to the atmosphere unique to the soccer culture. There have been other great moments in my relationship around Detroit city and the NGS. But nothing close to that match.
For that season and the next, I found myself making every weekend home date. The uncertainty of the bottom tier of American soccer saw teams disappear with every off season. The time before the new schedule was released was and is, a time of anxiety. The tension of will those vacation days still be available for the away matches. Then my life rudely disrupted the summer manta of Soccer. Kids. Everything else. Such is the way the drug of soccer dominates ones life. One by one the touchstones of that first season have fallen.
The supporter created Rust Belt Derby between FC Buffalo, DCFC and AFC Cleveland has fallen victim to the growing number of teams in the region. The hatred of Ohio has shifted to certain Michigan supporter groups. The natural extension of Detroit’s relationship with the rest of the state. On this first warm day hinting of the coming Spring and the DCFC season there is the reality that I will once again be able to be in the terraces of Keyworth one time. It will be another soccer bucket list match. Fifty years to the day that Glentorran FC of Northern Ireland played has the Detroit Cougars of the 1967 American Soccer League.
Living outside Detroit during the season is the only drawback to the peace of living where I do. For 9 months out of the year, my children come first. In all things. During that time following my natural inclination of spending large chunks of time alone doesn’t matter. With every announcement or event on twitter and Facebook, my withdrawal gets harder. To the point of depression. Being an Ultra for your club isn’t fun. Some of the joy is shared misery of on the field performance. Or the following of favorite players doing well in their pursuit of the dream of professional status. To love a lower tier club is to invite disappointment into your life. To understand the quality of play isn’t what you watch from the comfort of your home.
The difference is being part of the atmosphere only experienced by being there. The sun beating down. When attending a match is a trail to be endured. One that will leave you sore. Disheartened. Affect your performance at work the next day. One you willing welcome with the coming weekend. Not paying the rent to attend the match. Scarf collections. Checking the bank account every time merchandise is announced. Yes it is my Addiction. One for which the fix can be had during a very small window. One that is dependent of a schedule you have no control over. All the planning done means nothing if work or family or something else conflicts. Even the online stream is in conflict with my schedule.
For all this I gladly suffer. MY CLUB. It needs me has much as I need it. Realizing you have an addiction is the first step in solving it. My solution is finding the circumstances in the rest of the year to attend every match during the two months of the season. No I don’t want to be cured. Or manage it. I want the damn lottery.
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